Although I have never tried any damn thing out with truth, I had to keep a sober and gentle name of this composition since there is always a threat from my family reading it afterwards. And since I have heard one wise man ( I am not very sure of his wisdom since he was a friend ) saying “experience is the past tense of experiment “, I thought of doing some real good experiment of writing my experiences to honor this wise man who is never honored in his life because of his scatty behavior.
BLAST FROM THE PAST –
He had the power. Not the kind of power you can get from fame and money, but the savage type; the type of power that very few are born with and that is the power of boring others till they run away panicking of the consequence. Well, by default he still is a very good friend of mine whom I never dared to listen any day.
It was a tainted summer night with the sweet smell of a rotten rat from somewhere and the melodic chorus of crickets all around. Dogs barked lazily in the distance as if they sensed the presence of unseen evils or probably they smelled the aroma of curry of a stolen chicken. I was seriously giving tips to friends who were trying to succeed with their impossible love interests. But the fact to worry was; many of them had common love interests with same girls. The wise man came and sat near me scratching his 16 years old head and I sensed danger. Then after a long pause he said “you guys just don’t spoil your time running after girls. If you re-arrange the letters in the word Mother-in-law, they come out to Woman Hitler”. Everybody was impressed with his speech except me since I knew that he was severely scolded by the college beauty queen the previous day after passing her some good comments. Finally he said “why don’t we go hunting in the woods?” Not single person supported my cry “No” and so the hunting expedition was agreed unanimously. Since we all were quite inexperienced, the wise man took the charge of getting weapon for all of us. To satisfy our ego, that night on fire we all took the oath and that was not to take food till we catch a prey.
Finally the day came. And fortunately he also came. But with a get up which was almost similar to Cobra man from Nagraj Comics and some unusual weapons which could be thought while on a hunting. Anyways we all individually chose our weapons. I chose an axe from the total of 2 air guns, 4 axes and 3 long knifes. Then like brave soldiers we all started for the woods. At the jungle we all painted our faces with black lines obeying his instruction. I was looking horrible as I checked my face in the bike’s mirror. Forgetting that, we all entered the jungle carefully and decided not to go far inside as there was a threat of loosing direction. After going 100 meters inside the jungle, we climbed up the trees to wait for preys to arrive and also to avoid encounter with wild beasts.
God was never merciful on us for that illegal trip as it started raining breathless. After sitting wet on trees for 5/6 hours and after not seeing a single animal coming near, we all decided to pack up for the day. But again the ego in all of us never allowed us to take food without catching a prey. We did what we used to do the best. We stole 2 chickens from wise man’s uncle’s lot after his guidance and he again took the initiative of cooking it for all of us. At 1 AM at night when we started eating the food, we all discovered a new recipe for the first time. Probably it was salty chilly chicken curry or whatever, which could make a patient stable if he is having abnormally low blood pressure. But then it was hunger which never allowed us to shout a lot on him. Well, next morning I felt the sounds of carnival coming from my stomach.
THE BLAST –
It was a gloomy day. We all got the news that film actress Silk Smitha committed suicide and I was consoling a friend who was crying like a mad dog. The wise man came with a dull face and sat near me again scratching his head. As usually I kept silence as I sensed danger in his activity. Then he uttered his wise words “Why so depressed? The death of Silk Smitha is definitely a tragedy. But mourning for her would never help her soul to reach the heaven.” Everybody was damn impressed.
Then he suggested “why don’t we go for a picnic?”
My friend stopped crying and everybody was dead silent for a moment. The next moment, everybody jumped on him like a cluster of vultures on prey and the revenge of the hunting expedition was taken.
After an hour we all were sitting close and discussing about the picnic and the wise man was leading the show by giving his wired ideas.
Cabbage: A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.